Should i talk about my problems?
Or should i keep them private?
Can telling people about my problems help me feel better?
A year ago i had a sleepless night as a i was annoyed because i discovered a problem with my car. The problem was that something went wrong with the mirror that it used to heat so much until smoke could be smelled as soon as i turn the engine on.
Because i had very limited time back then to visit the service center the problem kept me annoyed all night. The next morning i decided to try to fix the problem myself.
So i freed some time, brought the tool box ill use and the car’s manual. As soon as i started collecting these stuff i felt way better! Of course my bad feelings didn’t end but i experienced a great improvement while i was on my way to fix my car.
Why do we sometimes feel better right after taking actions even though our problems weren’t solved yet? Its because as soon as your mind believes that there is hope bad feelings get reduced.
Your current emotional state at any point of time is determined by the way you think of your past, present and future. Even if something bad happened in the past and nothing exciting was going on in the present you could still feel great because of expecting something really good to happen in the future.
In other words, thinking about the future positively can certainly make you feel good. Am sure you already know that telling yourself to be positive is nonsense and that it usually doesn’t work but there is something even better than talking that works.
When you take an action that brings hope to your mind your will automatically think positive and you will feel better even if your problems weren’t solved yet.
When you start to talk about your problems instead of ignoring them you actually tell your mind indirectly that you are seeking help and because such an action is enough to bring hope to your mind the bad emotions ease. (see also Is distracting myself a good thing)
Talking about your problems is like preparing your tool box the way i did before i went to fix the car. Its like bringing the tools you have and the inputs to the surface so that you can can find a way to solve your problems. At least this is how your subconscious mind sees the setup and that’s why it makes you feel better.
Even talking to yourself can help you feel better if you did it out loud or if you wrote your thoughts down. When it comes to ending a bad emotion all you need to begin with is providing yourself with hope that your problems can be solved.
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